If you (or your loved ones) are feeling anxious about the future, uncertain of how your life will be impacted by the collective choices, this article is for you.
Anxiousness and worry are two common forms of fear. (It’s a sneaky, shape-shifting bugger!)
So, what is fear? And why does it exist? Maybe most importantly, what do we do with it when it arises in us?
Fear is the idea: There is not enough.
Not enough resources, not enough love, not enough time, not enough rights, not enough peace, not enough joy, not enough money.
Fear is the idea of lack. And it’s reflected to us in our day-to-day lives:
- There is not enough healthy food to feed all the people.
- There are not enough natural resources to fuel our technology, electricity, and vehicles.
- There is not enough water for people to drink, bathe, and live a healthy life.
- There is not enough access to education, technology, and resources.
- There is not enough time to accomplish everything we want.
- There is not enough love and safety to feel buoyant in trying times.
The idea of lack manifests itself in countless ways, and when we look deeply at the very foundation of fear and lack we find a tender question:
“What about me?”
We also find its related questions:
“What about my family? My needs/desires/wants? My community? My culture? My country? My [fill in the blank]? Will I have enough? Will we have enough?”
The question, “What about me?” is tender.
Of course we want our needs to be met and our loved ones to be safe and nourished.
Why does fear exist?
As Paul Selig & The Guides [1] say,
“Fear is a shitty dance partner who always steps on your toes and demands to lead.”
“Fear’s sole purpose is to create more of itself.”
Maybe you’ve already experienced how the thought “What about me?” leads to feeling isolated, alone, defensive and protective.
For business owners it can sound like,
- “Will I have enough clients to stay in business?”
- “Will I be able to thrive in these coming times?”
- “How will the current political issues impact my bottom line?”
- “Are my services still relevant and needed?”
When we think these thoughts, it causes a physical body reaction. We begin to isolate ourselves; we want to just go to bed with our favorite tv show, snack and zone out. We numb, over-use social media, drink, exercise, or otherwise consume to excess – and then feel even more awful.
This is a natural spiral down into feeling stuck: unable to move forward or feel hopeful.
What do we do with fear when it arises in us?
The good news is that fear is a biological experience, and that once you understand how to dance with your biology instead of dancing with the fear, you’ll experience relief, a new sense of freedom from the fear-based thoughts that arise in all of us from time to time.
It’s a biological experience because we all have the same nervous system that detects safety or threat. It’s scanning 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, like a threat detector. Its interpretation of the information around us is what can cause this fear response.
This scanner is called Neurosception, a concept coined by Dr. Stephen Porges of the Polyvagal Institute, [2] and it works with our nervous system for us. And when we understand how it’s functioning, we can actually do something with this fear that can relieve us both in our minds and body – no matter what is happening around us.
Understanding how to move through and beyond the fear that arises is a practice. And it’s one I’ve dedicated a lot of time and love to share more about. Please watch this free training so you can gain awareness and practice knowing how to move through fear to reclaim your peace and joy.
There’s no sale at the end or strings attached; I created it so everyone can have access to this wisdom that is essential during challenging times.
My hope is that it brings you relief and a sense that all is well, so you can focus on what’s important in your life and access your brilliant creativity to make the changes you want to see in the world.
Resources:
[1] Paul Selig & The Guides: https://paulselig.com/
[2] The Polyvagal Theory & the Polyvagal Institute: https://www.polyvagalinstitute.org/
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Marla Mattenson
With a 25+ year career, Mattenson is a trailblazer in transforming sales paradigms from transactional to relational for professionals who prioritize the integrity & fulfillment of their services. She is a champion of consent-based sales.
www.instagram.com/marla.mattenson
